I met a white lioness tonight.
There's an odd opening.
The white lions are said to be a sort of lion that taught men to hunt, and become a strong species. And when mankind is in trouble, they come again to rescue and teach us. The one who told me this is this white lioness, and had little inkling that Kamilah is a white mountain lion.
I make no claim to world changing powers. I did have some profound sobering cap to many other moments, discussing things like responsibility with Eva and Gabrielle over the weekend.
And of course, the topic of personal transformations. Like who Kamilah is.
Kamilah is the child's voice, who sees things she likes, and says so. Sees things she does not like, and says 'no'. She says, "Going to the dentist feels like vacation. Quit this job."
She's that core of person, that inner spark that makes life worth living. Fail to nourish her, and I fail to nourish myself. Ignore her and she will shut me down. She can be my engine or my anchor. She always knows which way to happiness and fulfillment. She sees the wounded and wants to heal them. She sees the oppressed and wants to defend them. And she wants peace and contentment.
She wants the damned world, really, in a benevolent overprotective mother sort of way.
She nearly drowned once, under a pile of other voices from the outside, the ones who tried to tell her what to like and not to say no, and not to have such an opinion on dentists and jobs.
But she's stronger now, and like Atlas lifted the lot of those outside voices, and tossed them defeated in a heap at her feet. Defeated, but not slain. For to disregard all others would be to destroy herself, to deny the need to heal the sick, and protect those in need of shelter.
Kamilah is my voice of direction. These others, advise, and provide meaning.
Never before have I felt such camaraderie.
The trick to the voices of others that we need for purpose and meaning, is to find our tribe.
Some fortunate ones are born in place. Others must go forth and seek it out. Most of us will change tribes throughout our lives as we change into new incarnations, and grow.
In this time, in this point in my path. Kamilah has found her tribe.
Good night, Caledon.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
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5 comments:
Kamilah-
There are no adequate words to describe the sense of clan (tribe) that I felt with you and others this past weekend.
I am honored.
Eva
CaleCon was nothing but complete joy. The last time I felt so "connected" to a group was 17 years ago.
Kami - I have always said this in SL (long before this past weekend) and I'll say it again now...you rock. :-)
Gabi
Kamilah.
You have changed a life for the better.
Mine.
Your freindship will always be appreciated.
Angelus.
It was wonderful to meet everyone in person and confirm that we did indeed already know each other! A great time was had by all.
And a great pleasure to meet you, Kamilah; you also made a great impression on Pæony.
-Rik
A moving and thought provoking blogpost. Thank you. Makes me realize why I sometimes feel an emptiness/"outsider-ness" in Second Life- I have numerous good and close friends here, but perhaps I have not yet found my tribe....the search continues
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